Inside of a dog, it’s too dark to read.” - Groucho Marx “Outside of a dog, a book is man’s best friend.Then by all means follow that path.” - Ellen DeGeneres Unless you’re in the woods and you’re lost and you see a path. I'm just going to ask where they're going and hook up with ’em later." - Mitch Hedberg “I'm sick of following my dreams, man.That way when you criticize them, you are a mile away from them and you have their shoes.” - Jack Handey “Before you criticize someone, you should walk a mile in their shoes.
“Money cannot buy health, but I'd settle for a diamond-studded wheelchair.” - Dorothy Parker. “You know you’ve reached middle age when you’re cautioned to slow down by your doctor, instead of by the police.” - Joan Rivers. Take yourself a little less seriously with these funny quotes about life. When life give you lemons… you know the rest. Sit back, relax, and bring a bit of comedy into your life with these 111 lines of reflection, humor, and lived experience. This collection of fun and funny quotes will hopefully bring a smile to your face, and can be used for a variety of crafts, like cards, posters, and signs, or for social media captions and graphics. Our family's favorite pastime is trying to convince others we are normal.Whether you’re stuck at work, waiting for your train, or just scrolling down your feed, you may need a little extra enjoyment to make your day feel brighter. It's messy, might give you a stomachache, and you can't get enough of it. When neighbors see my extended family all get together, they think, "Welp, there goes the neighborhood.". Keep calm and stop trying to figure out a way out of this crazy clan. So glad this family is on my side, because they would make terrifying enemies. If no one else will have us, we will still all have each other. If you come to one of our family get-togethers, remember, we warned you. You cannot choose your family, but you can send them to voicemail. Funny quotes about life full#
Our family tree is full of saps, nuts, and several bird-brained individuals. This family is one clown short of a three-ring circus. These giggle-worthy sayings remind everyone that extended family can drive you bonkers, but they are funny people who you couldn't do life without. They might be wild, quirky, and silly, but no matter what, they are all yours, and you love them endlessly. Your extended family is truly something else. Quotes That Paint a Perfect Picture of Your Extended Family These guys pay for your internet." - Unknown " Sisters never quite forgive each other for what happened when they were five." - Pam Brown. "Always be nice to your children, because they are the ones who will choose your rest home." - Phyllis Diller. "Children are a great comfort to us in our old age, and they help us reach it faster, too." - John Ruskin. "Some family trees bear an enormous crop of nuts." - Wayne Huizenga. "Family ties mean that no matter how much you might want to run from your family, you can't." - Unknown. "Happiness is having a large, loving, caring, close-knit family in another city." - George Burns. "Having children is like having a bowling alley installed in your brain." - Martin Mull. If they turn out bad, it means they took after her side of the family." - Jeff Foxworthy 
My feeling is if they turn out good, then that means I was a good daddy and put a lot of effort into it.
"My wife is so analytical with raising kids, and I am not. That's how I learned to dance, waiting for the bathroom. These famous people know a thing or two about humor and family, and their hilarious words prove that! Children are the spice of life, but that spice is like ghost pepper level. This family runs on love, laughter, and several Happy Meals a week. There is so much I love about our little family, especially the part where they all fall asleep. It is a really good thing these kids are cute. We created this band of little monsters, and we have no one to blame but ourselves. 
I am so glad we are raising this family together, because the mere thought of doing it all alone terrifies me.Parenting with a partner means one of you takes the kids on, while the other hides in the bathroom with a sleeve of Oreos.There is nothing I'd rather do than raise these kids, except maybe take a nap.Being a parent means committing to passing out snacks, looking for LEGO figures, and repeating yourself constantly for eighteen-plus years.Nothing in life can scare me I'm a parent.These quotes on family from a parent's perspective will make every mom and dad out there say, "Yep! Me too!" Parenthood is one wild trip, and sometimes you have to laugh at the craziness that comes along with the most beautiful journey in the world. Funny Family Quotes That Describe Parenthood to a Tee
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